saturday

I have just about spent the week at home, drawing every day for hours on end. Ive been using the oil pastels as im fresh out of card stock. Ive done some lovely pieces. Beautiful colours beaming out at u. So Ive got to take photos of all my work. Its fun to work with colour. Im feeling a bit down still, perhaps going outside a bit more might help.

I watched a cooking show today, (no suprises there) where they made Apple & toffee muffins. I figured the only thing missing is the caramels so Im off to get them tomorrow, we have apples that are not being eaten. Im happy I lost almost a kilo and have hardly done anything other than eating less. Imagine if i threw some walking into the mix?!

I am hopefully heading out tomorrow... not sure where to but somewhere would be good. I am tired of fighting at times. However I have to. Oh lime tree is looking terrific they will be ready in a weekish in which i shall make the lime new york cheesecake with.

Anyhow gots to go.. back later alligator

obsession

Im obsessed with drawing these trees. Ive been drawing them over and over and over all colours. I bought some more markers, an art journal and some oil pastles to experiment with. I spent a fair bit today. Oooops. Its not like I have spent too much anyhow within budget. I got my artist discount too. Think I may go to the library and grab some books off the shelves and look at some art work. I dont have too many books here and I need to be inspired some more. That being said, I am feeling quite down and I think it's just cause of whats happening in the world at the moment. At times my dreams seem better than waking up.

So i'm drawing it out. I feel like I heal through my art. Im going to get a few bits framed over the next few weeks. So what now for this little bee? Well I drew a lovely picture for the front page of journal. If I work like the clappers over the next few weeks I can make the market for april at yarragon. I want to go check out this art therapy group that runs at the old convent in abbotsford, see if I can link in with them or be inspired to actually do a course.

So right now Im a bit on a sugar high, had too much coffee today and I have not fallen into a slumber yet...IM sure I shall sleep later...my bed time as of late has been midnightish just over. At the moment dads using my computer at night as his is kaput, so its gotten me being creative. I will get to painting tomorrow.. even if its just with ink on paper. What else? Had breakfast out. Had a great day. Tomorrow I must post a few things to a few friends.


cheers..

albell

inspiration

I went for a walk today, changed handbags over to the blue olga berg bag I found at an opshop. I bought the ingredients for the risotto, went into the scrapbooking shop found some beautiful stamps so I bought them. They have inspired me to draw bigger versions of them in colour with pencil and some in letraset markers. So Ive been drawing obsessively since I got home. Wrote a few letters on the back of the ones I dont like. So I would like to paint using these as my base. On the weekend I want to call into the art store get the entry forms for the art contest plus see about the beginners water colour classes. Also buy a goo art journal so I can piece together where im heading with some of my pieces.

I really would like to have an another exhibtion by the end of the year and find a new mentor. I guess its back to the market perhaps next month, if i go like the clappers for the next few weeks and have even more stock that will be great. I guess I will go make a nice cup of apricot... earl grey or perhaps green tea.

So take care out there.


cheers big ears.

R.E.M

I grabbed some songs off itunes of rems new album. I chose only 5 songs off there. Im listening to the lyrics and music... i have been crying and crying from it. Especially Oh My Heart and wALK iT bACK my two favs I have on repeat at the moment.

In my head with one of the songs all these memories of the past come flooding through the gate and into the home of my heart. Its making me cry but It what I need is to cry it out. Im sad cause i have been remembering these beautiful lil snippets of my past, one in particular where I went to visit my friend in bendigo and they had two dogs.. i got on my knees when I went there and they greeted me. I also remember in my stay during that time I went outside with a cup of tea and sat in the morning light thinking about things and just being at peace. Then my beautiful friend came out and just sat there chatting. I never drank coffee til after 2001 i dont know why. I do like a lattee here and there now.

I was once told that I was a temple and to look after myself. What other things are flying about from these dusty shelves of time? I recall this photo I have hidden of me hugging one of the cats at katies farm in benders... and in the poto the cat is smiling the smae smile as me... and the sun beams on my head,,, creating a halo.

So where has that crown gone? I have fallen and fallen.All everyone wanted for me was happiness and all I gave myself and letmyself feel was sadness. No wonder my very first date with a giy wasnt so great, hestood me up the next time after id waited 3hrs at the train station in hope he might arrive.

Speaking of past.. how many men did i like? Was it a few? I guess these are the days these are the ways of myself. The sun has really shined and I ignored all that grace and parents words of encouragement to lead my own life.

this book tonight is closed for me.. to many tear are falling

drifting away to the deep night and losing dreams.

night night.

thought

The world held its breath, the pin dropped, the moment she went east her heart pulled her west. Still the world held its breath, before that pregnant pause, in that moment of silence she walked away from it all.

Now inside (where the heart has stopped beating)the bird that used to tweet to remind her of all that beauty has become but dead. She used to sit outside and try to understand them, when locked up she could hear them now one step near and they fly away. An evil lurking.

The world let go, the pin dropped, the darkest fears emerged from being a dancer in the dark, her heart no longer pulled by the winds but by a laden emptiness, a ship that had sunk long ago, grave fears fill her waking moments and sorrow hath become her.

end.

broken up

Its 11pm and scooter has finally settled for the evening, I cant move from here. Well I can but oh well. Ive been dreaming a bit lately, some nightmares about bush fires. I had one great dream this beautiful purple sheet with a tiger on it was been held by two people and I was watching pictures move on the wall.. content in there. I have been crying myself to sleep too. I guess everyone does that from time to time.

well im breaking up inside out.

night night

albell

broken up

I made jam yesterday, rhubarb and vanilla, Im looking at macaroon recipes and may attempt them tomorrow.. though I feel like carrot cake. I have not been blogging very much, have not felt so. Currently I am making my way slowly slowly through the movie Eat Pray Love, Ive broken it up into sections so its watchable. Laugh if you will about this....Eat segment, pray segment and love segment. The book is not so long but the movie is 3 hourish.

I have dinner in the oven., just spinach and ricotta rolls and salad for dad and I as mum and aunty anna have gone away for a few days to the big smoke. I tried these chips in the cupboard, balsamic and sea salt, i CANNOT eat them... bleh bleh bleh. Even with some lemonade. sheesh.

I have a few new pen pals to write to now. Another one from france and one from germany. I got my paints out but didnt quite manage to get to the canvas, I am addicted to fluff friends fb. I am going to make some tags tonight too. ANyhow the oven timer is about to go.. write more later alligator...

cheers big ears